The Fallacy of Fulfillment - The widespread belief that an individual can’t be truly happy or whole until they find their soulmate.

The Fallacy of Fulfillment makes an idol out of romantic relationships.

Do not make any gods to be alongside me; do not make for yourselves gods of silver or gods of gold.Exodus 20:23

True completeness is found only through relationship with God.

The Fallacy of Fulfillment creates unrealistic expectations for marriage.

The Fallacy of Fulfillment creates a stigma out of being single.

Bottom Line

Our primary purpose in life is to seek first the King and the King’s Kingdom.

“The most important command is this: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.
Mark 12:29-31

Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
Matthew 6:33

Key Question: How best can you know and serve God?

I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.
1 Corinthians 7:32-35

Singleness is an opportunity, not a deficiency.

Action Steps

Prayer: Create some space to prayerfully consider the following:

• How much have I been influenced by the fallacy of fulfillment?
• In what ways I’m I relying on a romantic partner to give me something that only God can give me?
• Is my central purpose in life truly to love and serve Jesus?  If not, then what is it?
• Is my marriage purposed around loving and serving Jesus?  If not, then what is it?
  

Practice:

• If you are single, ask Jesus how he is wanting you to seek him and his kingdom right now.
• If you’re married, ask Jesus how he is wanting you to build your marriage around seeking him and his kingdom right now.